‘I’m scared my partner is tracking my phone after an odd comment about a friend’

A woman has been left frightened that her partner could be tracking what she does on her phone, after he made a bizarre comment about one of her male friends.

The woman confessed her partner has always taken issue with her having male friends, and always insists there must be more to it, but she’s adamant it’s no different to having female friends.

“I have several male friends; they are just friends and nothing sexual has ever happened between us, yet my partner has always had an opinion on this,” she explained on Mumsnet.

“He thinks men who want to be friends with a woman are just biding their time to pounce basically.”

The woman went on to say that she speaks to two of these male friends regularly on Facebook, but again, insists the conversations are always “normal” and don’t include any flirting or such.

However, things have started to get a little strange recently, in the sense that whenever she does speak to one of these friends, her partner will always make a comment about how she’s been “speaking to her other boyfriends,” or joking about who she’s been texting.

“He’s always done this and I put it down to him just being a d*** sometimes but its taken me a while to connect the fact that he always says these things when I have in fact had a conversation with one of them and we don’t speak daily, sometimes it’s a month or two so it can’t just be luck. It’s honestly like he knows but how could he unless he’d seen the messages?”

The woman said she had a conversation with one of the friends yesterday, and then her partner came home from work and immediately made jokes about who she’d been texting, while asking again about her “other boyfriends.”

“He couldn’t have even looked at my phone so is he just bloody psychic!?” she added.

“About a year ago some man I wasn’t even friends with messaged me and it went into message requests so I didn’t even see it. My partner had a go at me for messaging other men and I was massively confused as I hadn’t even seen the message.

“When I saw it and figured out what he meant I asked if he’d been looking at my Facebook from my iPad and he denied it, but I’d had my phone with me so it was the only way he could have seen.”

She later deleted her Facebook from the iPad, meaning she believed the only way he could access her account would be through her phone, which has led her to question whether she’s “going crazy” or something really is going on.

Many Mumsnet users commented to suggest he may have her password and be accessing her profile on another device, but the majority agreed that he is almost certainly reading her messages.

“I had this happen to me by a former abusive partner. He had somehow got hold of all my passwords. Change your passwords including for your email so he can’t get a password hint or reset or anything by email. If he still does it then he’s installed spyware,” one Mumsnet user commented.

“But your problem in this relationship is much bigger than this and if he’s spying on you then you almost certainly need to leave him unless he’s willing to get help for his paranoia.”